Pieces of Life Puzzles

I am glad that i brought my laptop over to my in-laws place for the month of confinement. This little equipment really keeps me sane when times are bad.

These days, I could feel myself falling into cranky mood swings as my tears dropped easily like tap water whenever someone, especially my MIL, ask me to do something via my Hubby or when I just started hating how things are done here, all of a sudden.

Even after much coaxing and cuddles from Hubby, it just does not keep it in check. Things just get worse when Hubby has to leave to start preparing for work after 2 weeks of paid leave.

To add to the heavy package, Brian has not been sleeping well due to congestion of phlegm in his throat and a bit of stuffy nose. He cries and moan whenever he wakes up during the day. He was slightly better today after seeing the GP yesterday, but the bad days aren’t over as yet.

Up till now, i still feel alienated from Brian. I wonder how people bond with their kids once they are born. As i stare at him or feed him, questions start flooding my head. Is he my kid or my little brother? There’s a confusion here i guess. In reality I do have a brother who is 9 years younger than me. Perhaps motherhood has not quite sink into me yet. I am still living in the dreamland of couple-hood, still floating in another dimension.

So these are the ‘fun’ my bosses told me about when one has a kid, and it is very true that money starts rolling out instead of ‘in’ once a kid is born. I am getting the bitter side of things so far and i think it will take 10,000 or more aunties to convince me for a number two in the future.

Tags: Brian